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Inspired by the Dungeon Dozen – A rude awakening… August 16, 2012

Posted by ficial in games, RPG.
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A really great site (if you’re in to that kind of thing) is the Dungeon Dozen: “flavor-rich yet detail-free idea stimulation for fantasy RPGs in the form of random tables for the underused 12-sided die” – I highly recommend browsing it for a while, and probably bookmarking it as well.

I was inspired by that site, on the drive to work today I came up with…

The party awakens to a loud banging at the door late at night, or perhaps early in the morning. They look out and see a nattily dressed ogre carrying, among other things, a very heavy and well-worn walking stick. He bellows “Ai! Ai you! Wehkee up in dehr! Mista’ Awgish would lahk ah-ee wehrd wi’ you…

  1. on da subjek ov ah-ee cer’in young laidees vehrchoo!”
  2. regahdin’ ah-ee pah-tikooler soong dot’s been mah-keen dee roons!”
  3. ’bout ah-ee bi’ ov aht dot’s gohn misseen!”
  4. on mah’ahs bees’ discoosed een proivih’!”
  5. ‘fore ee runs you aou’ aw teh-oon!”
  6. consuhnin’ monies eh-ewed fo’ suhvices rhendahed!”
  7. on mah’ahs een connec-shun wi’ ‘is nefoo!”
  8. ‘fore dee awderse ketch up t’ yuh!”
  9. regahdin’ da steh’ ov yuh’ emplawmunh’!”
  10. ’bout yaw ak-tiviteees in d’ tahvuhn lehs’ nah’!”
  11. as to yuh plens fo’ de preh’y joory ewe ‘ave soo recen’ly aquahd!”
  12. wi’ respec’too ‘is awpreshuns dat ‘ave ‘ad some prawbums ov lai’!”
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